Help us put Palestinians out of work. Support BDS, because for every success we achieve, some Palestinians families lose their jobs. Just remember how successful we were closing the Sodastream factory in the West Bank. No tears for the Palestinians comrades, we western Marxists know what is best for them.
Labour Against the Witch Hunt (LAW) esteemed and magnificent leader Phony Greenslime has opened a JustGiving page for help in purchasing his train tickets. He has calculated the cost of attending at £985. These funds will be used to purchase train tickets, accommodation, drinks down the pub and so on. He realises it is a little 'steep', but he needs the comfort of first class travel and a 5 star hotel because fighting against imperialism and capitalism and the witch hunt is such hard work. Please can you make sure you go to the right donating page, as Phony now has 345 separate pages and it is all getting a little confusing. To help with this - Phony will soon be opening a JustGiving page to fund part time assistance that he needs to keep track of it all. He thanks all our comrades in advance for their help
A discussion about how many smaller groups we can break up into
The meeting will start by kicking 'Socialist Fight' (SF) from our group because they are anti-Semites. 'Fight for Socialism' (FRS) will be placed on a 'watch list'. The groups 'Labour absolutely against the Witch Hunt'(LAAW), 'Against the Witch Hunt in Labour' (AWHL), Stop the Witch Hunt (SWW), and 'Comrades Unite Now Together in Solidarity'(oops), are all okay until Phony, our esteemed leader says otherwise.
The next item on the agenda is an adjustment to our first principle - originally agreed at our first meeting. It currently reads - 'No auto-exclusions or expulsions. Everyone has the right to a fair hearing.'. Phony and our other esteemed, but not so magnificent leader, Jokelyn Whaker, propose it should now read - 'No auto-exclusions or expulsions. Everyone has the right to a fair hearing. The only exceptions are when Phony and Jokelyn decide to auto-exclude or expel anyone - then it is okay'. It will be assumed everyone agrees on this and it will pass without dissent. Anyone who opposes will be expelled because they are anti-Semites
One of the outlets of the notorious Zionist group - Elders of Zion, has used Fascist Zionist apologist Guido Fawkes, to announce that the group Socialist Fight will also be holding a meeting, in the same pub at the same time. Please do not get confused between the two groups. They will be wearing swastikas, and we will be holding up placards with the name 'Labour Against the Witch Hunt' (if you want to contribute towards the cost of the placards - please see Phony or Jokey for the correct JustGiving page.
Jokelyn is delighted to announce that she can attend, for a short while. Jokelyn is coming back from a gruelling tour of the far-east just to stand in solidarity with our comrades. She is landing at Heathrow at 10:30am and should make it in time. She does have to be back at Gatwick for 2pm because she has a flight for another gruelling tour, this time around Oceania. She apologises in advance for her early departure. I am sure we can all understand that comrade Jokelyn, who endured 15 gruelling tours in 2017, is in need of a much-needed break. Therefore, Jokelyn has opened a just giving page to contribute to some of the expenses she incurs. She says it is not easy, to keep coming back for her shows and then leaving again. She understands people want to see the show, but unless the target of $45,000 is met in 3 weeks, it is likely she may have to cancel some of her appearances.
This is an image of Jokelyn, at one of her recent gruelling tours. Here she is in deep concentration about the next best move for Labour against the Witch Hunt, Free Speech on Israel and Jewish Voice for Labour. Jokelyn clearly needs your help
It is not always easy to contact Jokelyn directly as she moves about a lot. Both Phony and Jokelyn understand this is a problem, and as a solution, have decided to take on a PA for Jokelyn, who will then be able to know exactly which country Jokelyn is in on which day. Just Giving page details will be released shortly.
Please remember to come, (unless you disagree with Phony in which case consider yourself expelled), please remember to donate (even if you disagree with Phony), please remember to spit on 'Socialist Fight', and please remember hating Jews is not antisemitism - never was - never will be - and no Jew can tell us differently. See you Saturday comrade.